It is no secret that girls love heavy foreplay before sex. Some girls cannot even achieve orgasm during sex without it.
Solid foreplay includes also a little bit of fingering.
Girls love it as it shows them that you are paying attention to their sexual needs. Although we guys love to go “into action” ASAP, proper foreplay will get both of you in the mood.
By doing everything ‘right‘ with your fingers, you will get her ultra wet and wanting more of you. If you are lousy at fingering, you may turn her off and she may not achieve orgasm.
Luckily, this step by step guide will tell you everything you need to know to make her scream from insane pleasure.
Turn Her On
As you may have already know the biggest sexual organ in a female body is her brain. Therefore, before you start with the fingering itself you need to stimulate it a lot with proper foreplay.
Luckily, there are some bulletproof techniques to turn her on easily:
- Compliment her looks and tell her how sexy she is
- Whisper in her ear how much you want her right now
- Give her gentle kisses along the neck/collar bone area
- Progress to a passionate making out
- Play with her breasts a lot
Once she seems to be turned on, it’s time to introduce your fingers and give her the experience of her lifetime. However, before you do I highly suggest to tease her a little bit more (see step #2).
If you have put effort into your foreplay and have turned her on, she will want you to enter her right at that moment. However, I like to be a little mean with my girls and tease them a little bit more before I start fingering them.
All you have to do is to:
- Travel slowly with your hand down her lower belly
- Go onto her panties with your fingers
- Cup her pussy over her panties
- Then you need to rub her pussy slowly through her panties
- While rubbing, continue kissing her passionately
Continue until you can feel that her panties are becoming wet. Only then proceed to the third step. If you want her to be much more aroused, do this from behind her.
Fingering Techniques You Have to Try
Although fingering and entering her pussy is usually a no-brainer, there are some mistakes a lot of guys repeat in the beginning. Before I will share with you special techniques to make her cum really hard (Clit Rubber, Pussy Slider & Come Hither), you need to check out a few basic rules.
1. Do not hurry into her
Rather tease her further on her inner thighs and outer labia until she craves you to be inside her.
2. Never enter her with anything that is dry
This rule covers even situations when she is well wet inside. Always use your or her saliva, or lube to make your finger wet.
3. Always enter with just one finger at first
This should be preferably your middle finger. After a while add a second (either index or ring) finger depending on the technique you will use.
4. Don´t go for a straight in & out motion
Some men who have very little experience with women, finger them with a straight ‘in and out’ motion that does absolutely nothing for them regarding stimulation. It’s literally like having sex with a teeny weeny penis, which most women will agree isn’t great.
There are two places you need to focus on while fingering her. These are her clitoris and her G-spot.
The Clit Rubber
Clit Rubber is one of the easiest techniques to finger a girl. However, some women are too sensitive to direct stimulation of a clitoris, therefore you need to “test the waters” first.
This method works best if you are both standing/kneeling and facing each other (or you are behind her).
There is a couple of steps you need to follow:
- Make both your middle and index finger wet (use lube or yours/hers saliva)
- With your lubricated fingertips start slowly rubbing her clitoris
- You can find it on top of her vagina, hidden under a soft skin called clitoral hood
- You can change it up a little bit and try soft tapping, circular motions, or gentle squeezing/rolling of her clit between your fingers
- You can gradually increase your speed but you need to maintain a steady rhythm
This is a very common and straightforward way she can easily reach an orgasm. When you use this technique, she will scream from pleasure in the end, trust me.
The Pussy Slider
The Pussy Slider is not a common technique to finger a girl. However, it works wonders especially is she has a very sensitive clit that cannot handle direct stimulation.
Again this technique is great if you are both standing/kneeling and facing each other (or you are behind her).
Steps you need to follow:
- Make sure your middle and index fingers are well lubricated
- Place tips of these two fingers on either side of her clit
- Then slide them down her vulva and enter her vagina
- Return to the second step and repeat this technique
This method is not that common, but it is still easy to do. Just remember that your fingers need to be well wet.
The Come Hither
The Come Hither technique is very powerful as many girls can actually squirt from this method of fingering, as long as she is turned on enough. Just don’t expect her to be gushing after a minute, it takes time and dedication.
She needs to relax fully, and you need to put the work in to get that end result.
The best way to do this technique is to kneel left of her (if you are right-handed) or right of her (if you are left-handed).
Steps you need to follow:
- Make your palm, middle, and ring finger well wet
- Enter her pussy with these two fingers
- Slope them upwards against her vaginal wall
- Do “come here” motion with your fingers inside her
- Your fingertips should be rubbing her front vaginal wall (where her G-spot is)
- At the same time, you will be cupping her clit with your lubricated palm for extra stimulation
- Start slow and gradually increase your speed and rhythm
- Continue up to an explosive finish (some women prefer this move to be fast while others like it slow and steady)
There are many more techniques you can use to make her squirt, such as “The Intense Stroker”, “The Hook Overdrive”, or “The Double Trouble”.
Be Ready to Go Further
Guys, just don’t go overboard. Fingering her for a very long time will become boring and her arousal level may go down significantly if you do not change it up.
Although playing with her pussy is pretty awesome, so is the real sex!
Trust me that after a few minutes of great fingering she will be begging you (through her body language) for something more.
Just look for one of these signs:
- She is pulling you towards her
- She is trying to unbutton your pants
- She is telling you she wants you
All these mean that she is very horny and wants something more than your hand. Obviously, a good fingering session always ends in her craving you to be inside her with your cock.
Avoid These Mistakes
Above, we have explained what you need to do. However, there are some mistakes that the vast majority of guys is doing.
So, here are some things you should avoid to give her the best experience possible:
- Long nails are a big no-no – You need to trim and file (use glass nail file) your fingernails to avoid scratching and hurting her pussy. Long nails are dangerous as the tips of your fingers will come in regular contact with her vaginal wall.
- Make it about her – Focus on fingering her even if you are really just waiting for the actual sex to begin. If she sees that you are enjoying it, she will relax and fully immerse herself in it.
- Each girl is unique – These are guidelines only, and as mentioned previously, no two women are the same. If she tells you she doesn’t like her clit to be rubbed, for example, stick to the other techniques mentioned. She’s more likely to have a good time if she is entirely comfortable with what is going on.
Just keep in mind that fingering is really important to women, as it’s the first step in serious foreplay, after kissing and touching of her breasts. Now that you know all the vital parts, why not put these steps into practice?
We hope that thanks to this guide you have mastered a precious skill that is sure to make her lust for you even stronger as she’s definitely going to be screaming your name once you are finished with her.
Reddit Users Share Some Tips
Focus mainly on her clit:
“I dated a girl one time who moved my hand to that location and I’ve seen it work with other girls I’ve been with since. As you can see from the image, the clitoris is actually a much larger organ (fun fact, it’s the only organ whose sole function is pleasure) than you may realize and extends into the body. If you rub in the spot indicated by the arrow you can experiment with how much pressure you apply.”
Rub it back and forth:
“One thing I’ve found that really works is to feel for something long and hard under the surface and rub almost like you are trying to move it back and forth. It feels like if you found a tendon on the back of your hand and started pushing it from one side to the other like a guitar string (it’s really hard to describe what I’m trying to describe). Anyhow, the ladies really seem to like it, so there you go.”
“Try cupping her bizz and massaging it. Girls seem to like that as well. Finally, you could try this: turn your hand palm upward, Curl your middle and ring fingers slightly and insert them. Inside of her, you should feel almost like a bony shelf (I’ve always assumed that this is the pelvic bone, but I’m not a doctor).”
“Use your curled fingers almost like you’re trying to get a hold of this bony shelf and as you do let the heel of your hand apply pressure to her clitoral area. Because the pressure is distributed (the heel of your hand is a large fleshy area) and because it’s a little pressure rather than rubbing (which might be too abrasive for her needs) you might find that it works better with her sensitivity.”
Male Reddit user CHIRON0224
Get to know her body & what she likes:
“I used to squirt occasionally but not often at all. As I started focusing more on my g spot (I could never orgasm from flit stimulation, I’m sensitive and the few times I have it was mixed and followed by pain) the more I found out what my body responds to in order to squirt.”
Try various techniques:
“My SO of the last few years seems to focus on giving me to most intense orgasms he could, and I started squirting more often. After seeing this video he tried this technique on me, someone who already squirts. I think this video, while giving a good amount of useful tips, neglects saying that not that exact combination of moves works for every girl. For instance, the rough up and down motions he does while his fingers are curled inside her doesn’t do much for me.”
“But curled and rotating/twisting motions with the fingers while simultaneously doing the “come hither” motion sets me off. Also, he says to go right to the flit when you feel her starting to come – this is a no for me. I need that steady motion to ride through the orgasm and reach that level where squirting is a definite.”
“Now though, 99% of the time I can’t help but squirt. It just happens, and I think my body get used to letting go enough to do so. Its messy for sure, but I wouldn’t trade it. I do wish I had control over it though. Its hard to get away with doing stuff in public or when you’re leaving wet spots or puddles around or in your pants lol.”
Female Reddit user
Various women need different kinds of stimulation:
“Here’s what I like. All women are different. It would be helpful if she were a masturbator, because then you could get a sense of how she likes her clit handled. Pretty much every woman is different. Some like it to be treated roughly, some women will wilt like tulips if you do much more than blow on it. I’m definitely toward the tulip end of the spectrum.”
In the beginning, avoid direct stimulation of her clit:
“Gentleman approaches and gently, I said gently pinches my labia together with the pads of his finger tips, right at the clit, where the lips meet. When he does that, he twangs the nerve bundle of my clitoris. He then kind of slides, again GENTLY, the labia up and down that nerve shaft. It feels good, and it’s not putting direct pressure or contact on the clitoris, which I don’t like until I’m ready to go.”
“Once I’m wiggling around & looking happy, he very slowly and gently slips a MOISTENED (lube or saliva) finger between the labia. He does not immediately mash the clitoris like an X-Box button, he makes a narrow V with his fingers and slides them around the clit, so he feels it between his fingers. Again, feels great, but it’s not direct stimulation.”
Play with her and tease her:
“Again, when wiggling & more “hurry up” signals commence, he will either continue with #2 if he wants to be mean, or go back to #1 if he wants to be really mean, or he will approach the opening. When going in, he doesn’t dither around the opening – there aren’t any pleasure sensors there, so nothing kills the ride more than having it messed with. He’ll enter (with clean hands and trimmed fingernails/no hangnails) with one finger at first, then two. Some women like ‘forward’ pressure – i.e. where you press upward toward their belly, with your fingers and make a kind of ‘come here’ motion – the G-spot is usually about 1-2 inches in.”
“For some reason, my bladder is right there, so that makes me feel like I have to pee, and it hurts. My gentleman who has been around the block a lot, claims I’m the only woman he’s known who is like this, so YMMV. Anyway for me, he usually presses down a bit while pushing his fingers inward, which is a happy feeling. He’s usually careful with his hands as well – sometimes if you’re really jamming your fingers in hard, you can pinch the labia against the sit bones or pubic bone, which hurts.”
Alternate your moves:
“He usually alternates penetration with clitoral rubbing then – I personally do not like intense clit flicking. The clit needs slippery moisture, and work with the pads of the finger, not the harder tip of the finger. He usually keeps the hood in between his fingers and my clit.”
Male Reddit user
Frequently Asked Questions
Should I Use Any Lube?
A lot of guys wonder whether they should be using a lubricant to make her even wetter. This is a tricky question as the answer really depends on a girl. Some don’t like any lube (and obviously don’t need it) while others love it.
However, we recommend trying lube at least once because if she has never used it, she may have no idea whether she likes it or not. If you decide to go for it, the choose a water-based lube to avoid any adverse skin reactions.
I would say to avoid ones that promise “tingling” sensations, especially if she is new to lubricants. Just keep in mind that lube will give her a helping hand in getting wet if she’s really tight down there.
It will enhance the experience even more and help her to enjoy your attention to the most.
What Should I Do With My Other Hand?
In most cases, you will be using only one hand to finger a girl. This gives you the opportunity to use your other hand to work her clit. It’s probably no secret to you that clitoral stimulation is crucial to many (especially younger) women.
Try making small circles with your fingers on her clit and also you can try to tap it gently. Just experiment with your fingers and where they seem like they are doing the job well on her vagina.
How Can I Read Her Responses?
You will be able to tell if she likes what you are doing by the way that she reacts. Maybe she will moan to tell you she’s enjoying it or maybe even scream obscenities.
However, some girls are much quieter, but you will still know by the way her body involuntarily acts to what you are doing to her body.
Just look for following signs:
- She is arching her back
- Her legs are shaking
- Her breathing is getting more labored
- Inside of her vagina starts to clench or tighten
Try changing up the pace of your fingers, to see whether she likes it fast or slow. It’s entirely possible for some women to reach climax only from fingering, in fact – many prefer it.
Not all women “squirt” fluids when they reach orgasm so don’t worry if she doesn’t. If all else fails in knowing if you are fingering her correctly, ASK HER – communication is critical when it comes to having amazing sex!